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24th Oct 2010, 19:04 #1481
Hey, I'm sorry to inturupt anyone here and I know a lot of you probably have bigger problems than me atm, but I just need somewhere to get this all out, and this is the only place I can think of doing that.
Basically for the past few weeks my sister has been living at my dads house since she lost her flat and doesn't have a real job. She was meant to be there for a month tops and she's now been there for 2 months with no improvment to her situation. She doesn't even try to find a proper job, she somehow thinks it'll just turn up on day. Anyways, this has obviously pissed my dad off somewhat since she doesn't do anything around the house either. I know some of you may know I don't exactly have the best relationship with my dad, but when my sister wasn't there, it got a lot better, we very rarely argued and we could actually have a joke together and talk, like have real conversations about stuff. Well, that doesn't happen anymore, the only time he talks to me is to yell at me. Usually for no reason at all. This weekend, for example, I've stayed in my bedroom, out of his way, yet he still yelled at me for 'Not doing anything around the house and using up electricity' Two things wrong with this. Out of his three children, I'm the one who does the most around the house and I don't even live there, the second thing is, I'm only ever there for two days, in which I'm mostly out.. Someone, please, explain how I'm 'using up electricity'
So anyways, today things really esculated. Today he actually rose his fist to my face and pushed me, almost down the stairs. Again, for no apparent reason. And told me to get the bus home. Thing is, he doesn't ever yell or anything at my brother or sister. I never ask him for money, or anything for that matter, while the other two are constantly doing so. I go to Uni three days a week and the other two I go to work, so he can't complain I don't do anything all day. The only day I don't do anything is Sundays. I deserve at least one day off a week right? Apparently not.
I just don't understand why he only does it to me, when I rarely see him anyways. My sister lives with him, constantly taking the piss, like friday her boyfriend stayed over and she didn't even tell him, let alone ask him. Did he say anythign to her about it? No. I just don't understand why, the only man in my life who is meant to love me uncontionally.. doesn't.
24th Oct 2010, 21:01 #1483
With the amount of tension there seems to be surrounding your family, the only suggestion i can really seem to give on this issue is to try and stay positive and try to stay on reasonable terms with your father; staying shut away from doesn't improve the conditions, but it can be an occasional escape for when situations become to high strung. I'm completely what to say about him physically coming at you though because I don't really have the jurisdiction to be telling your family what to do, but he should be respecting your personal space. Try to just keep a calm environment by keeping the mood light, respecting the other people in the houshold, and trying to explain to him the amount of work that you actually do around the house without sounding like you're trying to make him feel like he doesn't do enough.
The one problem that sounds like it needs to be dealt with though is your sister living at home. I can't exactly tell you how to do this the easy way, but it seems like she needs to start getting the message that it's time for her to either move out, start looking for a job, or at the very least doing some work around the house.
Overall, just try to keep everything going smoothly and try to talk this out with them. In every relationship communication is key. And don't worry about putting your problems here on TDC. Even though some of us aren't around very often (Like me for example because life is just too ****ing busy sometimes) we're still here for you as a secondary family.
Mademoiselle Stacylala, I wish you a Nifty day in the hopes that everything works out for you! =D
24th Oct 2010, 21:18 #1485
A lot of the time when he gets like this, I just keep my mouth shut, I've learnt that the more I say the worse he is. I know he's pretty stressed at the moment because of my sister being there, but I just don't see why he's deflecting his anger at her onto me.
But thanks <3
24th Oct 2010, 21:39 #1487
I think your dad does love you. He's your daughter! You may find it very hard to understand due to that negative extrinsic energy he gives you but he does love you - in a his weird little way. Like I don't get on with my dad sometimes and can't comprehend why the **** he does and says things to me that pisses me off extremely, but he loves me but in his little way too.
Try to have a talk with your dad without your siblings around. Say: "Hey, is something really bothering you lately? You seem to take it out on me dad. It's not too good." etc. and talk about that.
Tell your siblings to get off their ****ing asses and do some **** because it isn't fair. My brother sits on his ass and plays COD or Counterstrike all the time while I pretty much clean the house because I don't want to get yelled at when I get home. Mum and I yell at him to get off his ass. But dad won't say a thing. He would do it quick smart if dad told him too. Frustrating. It'll bite him in the ass when I leave for uni. I won't be there to clean up after his bull****. Karma will get your sister soon. She has to grow up a little. Your brother the same.
24th Oct 2010, 22:13 #1488
Thanks spam *hug*
My bro isn't so bad, since he's never there anyways. Its just my sis really. But She has a bunch of issues anyways and atm I'm one of the only people she trusts, so I can't really say anything to her about it, because she'll flip out. I mean like, she has depression, paranoia, anger issues and so on. So I have to step on eggshells when I'm around her.
26th Oct 2010, 21:44 #1490
I hate everybody and everything. mostly, i hate myself and the stupid things i do. life sucks and i don't even wanna live it anymore.
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